Kiaran Finn on Life Matters!

Stress Less.... 11/11/2017 0 Comments On a scale of 1 -10 how #stressed are you?  I overheard a small business owner respond '8' and my wife is at 9.5! Wow 9.5! Incidentally they don't reside in Syria, but do have two healthy kids, a house, car, retirement portfolio, passive income and a multitude of friends and family. There s a danger that we frame a downturn in our business in such dramatic terms. Context is a great sanity drug. If we make happiness an impossible Everest to attain then the moderate slings and arrows of the daily grind really will bring us down. Embrace the moment and dial down imagined fears. Con nect on  LINKEDIN  if you like. 0 Comments You Share The Planet With Almost 10% Of All Humans Who Have Lived Since 50,000 BC! 11/8/2017 0 Comments If you are 50 years old or more you've shared the planet with at lea...

99% Of What We're Worrying About WON'T Happen on the scale, scope or mannar we're previewing it. More @ www.elite-performance-academy.com/blog

Does #Social_Media annoy you? Do you feel like #detoxing ? Do other people's #opinions annoy you? What about #selfies ? Perhaps the weather is at fault. Certainly free to air TV must push your buttons. I'm not sure it's even possible to avoid this state (#ANNOYANCE) for an hour - perhaps this post, meme already mildly annoys you! Wouldn't it be interesting to delete this emotion for a week and see what happens. I suspect the impact would be profound. So here's my crazy game plan, maybe you'd like to give it a go. A lifetime of stimulus and automatic response is difficult to rewire, but perhaps an early awareness warning signal can allow us to catch the annoyance thought early and reframe it. The reframe:  'being annoyed is WEAK' Not a difficult belief to buy in to. A new thought response to a typical annoying trigger, for instance a polarising comment completely at odds with your world view... 'that's interesting!' It actually i...

TOP TWO THINGS TO WORRY ABOUT. Perhaps we worry too much about the stuff least likely to show up or impact our lives. Some general #mortality_statistics below (UNODC and Wikipedia) WORLDWIDE DEATHS PER WEEK Sharks less than 1 Terrorism 490 Drowning 6900 Murder 8400 Falling 10700 Car Accidents 24000 The odds are most of us worry about stuff least likely to manifest or impact our lives catastrophically. Connect on  LINKEDIN  if you like.

When I left the UK an eon ago I cut the source of my psychological heroin addiction and life has never been the same since.  #TV_Soap_operas . Problems are entertainment. Particularly though not exclusively other people's problems. The weather is usually a great and predictable source of complaint that bonds even the most disparate of strangers. Discuss a problem on your social media feed and be guaranteed a frenzy of activity. We love to be outraged, for our sensibilities to be threatened, the bigger the problem the more ravenous we become. Revisiting the UK I was surprised how a 3 or 4 year absence had negligible impact on keeping up with the soap opera's storyline. Same characters, same issues, same outrage, same problems - ZERO solutions. It's cleverly addictive as it plays into our default tendency to be Victim/Problem orientated. When asked how I am, there's only one tone of response: 'terrific, #tree _bloody_mendous,  #fan _bloody_tastic.' Not to be de...

Why do #OBNOXIOUS people win so often? We've all probably been hired, fired, abused, mistreated, the works by this species of owner/manager and wondered how have they survived...thrived even. My take, pre-framed by my expression of utter disdain for any form of #bullying behaviour in pursuit of a win. #High_Energy gets results. To split hairs I acknowledge that everything has a vibratory energy happening - even rocks....but in communication terms and in the presence of weak energy (ambivalence, disinterest, disengagement) higher energy dominates. Leaders good and bad exude energy. #Provocation = High Energy SHOUTING!!! = High Energy. Swearing = High Energy. The flip side of course is the energy and power of affirmative positive communication. Enthusiastic engagement = High Energy. #Praise = High Energy. #Passion = High Energy.

What's The #News in your world? Once upon a time (maybe 5 years ago) The News was something our peers ( 20 Million+ Australians) were equally exposed to.  Today The News is something we're drip fed through algorithmic retargeting. We are someone's niche.  My possibly imminent trip to Bali makes volcanoes News to me. My incessant clicking on sporting websites determines The News I'm exposed to. Occasional succumbing to click bait delivers me some celebrity gossip (#FAKE_News?)  Our online connections' utterances deliver what appears to be News - except it's all FAKE.  We are served up a filtered reality based on our behaviours and associations. We can consume an almost infinitely small broadcast of current affairs so I'm cool with choosing that which inspires, energises and empowers my daily life.  Occasionally I try to remind myself that it's still FAKE - a filtered reality of what I've chosen to focus on.

There's a fake hierarchy or continuum ranging from #WINNERS down to #LOSERS that we buy into online and by extension in life. #Hustle and WIN. #PERSIST and WIN. Get up at dawn and WIN. Closers WIN. Most views Win. Popular WINS..............................And yet it isn't so. In this game there are winners and losers. This is a competition based on ego preservation. Competition and collaboration are poor bedfellows and collaboration is a far better game.  Who are the losers when we close the deal, purchase the toy, get to #1? Everyone else - that's the message we're conveying. The healthiest and happiest of us are identified by how we respond to the success of others not by the results showing up in our own lives.  One of the first books to make an impression on me was "I'm OK, You're OK" (#Thomas_A._Harris 1969) That's the eponymous message regardless of the results we're currently producing. Chase alternate results, encourage ...

What gets you out of bed in the morning - lights your fire?  Necessity ? (JOB to pay the bills)  Purpose? (Feels like it's in your D.N.A to pursue a vocation)  Competition? (The need to conquer an Everest, Corporate ladder ascension,  to WIN)  The alarm clock? (Just going through the motions) For me I had a belated insight. I was pretty much useless, on any comparative ranking scale, at most things until I was 14. ( Origins and Academic Failure ) Academically bottom 5%. Sport bottom 30%. Confidence bottom 10%.  My insight is that I can only operate when inspired. If teachers weren't inspiring, sports coaches weren't inspiring, parents...then I needed to seek it out elsewhere. What get's me out of bed? To Inspire and be Inspired. It's an energy I seek out daily, offline, online, in every interaction. It's my prozac, my caffeine, my shot, that flavours life. Connect on LINKEDIN if you like. Kiaran Finn

Master the dark arts of selling and you will never be unemployed! Except of course that it's not a dark art. I hear so many stories of genuine, authentic well meaning business owners struggling because of their perceived lack of that killer sales instinct. "it's just not me" they say to themselves and others. Sales 'tricks' such as tie downs, soft closes, hard closes, negotiated closes, puppy dog closes....are not the domain of the introverted. Disclosure: I'm not fond of selling. I hate cold calling, particularly via the telephone, and I'm overly sensitive to rejection. On the introvert/extravert continuum I fall closer to the former. The real kicker is my overly active empathy gene - I really don't want to disturb you with my persistence, in fact at even the slightest hint I've over stayed my welcome I'm liable to beat a hasty retreat. Perhaps some of you can relate to this state of impotency. That said, you name it I...

Bored? Fake interest. Insecure? Fake confidence. feeling dumb? Fake thinking like a genius. Beliefs aren't real, they're filtered reality. What's interesting is that when we fake enthusiasm in even the most tedious of endeavours we become....you guessed it, enthusiastic. Likewise when we wish to impress but feel nondescript and unworthy, nothing works better than acting impressed. It's a myth to believe that anyone has a status superior to yours. It's a belief and can be altered. Fake it, not until you make it, (there is no making it) but until you wake up one day and realise it's no longer fake.

There is probably merit in not getting too invested in what others think of us. Books have been written such as Mark Manson's "The Subtle art of not giving a F***!" that support this philosophy. However when you see this pervade business interactions it boggles the mind. ​We get harried. We have bad hair days that spill out into our business dealings. We get overwhelmed. We get complacent. The most common poison I see in business is 'perfunctory service' a label I'm assuming is an oxymoron. It's so hard to to earn a prospect, think marketing, branding, merchandising, and a multitude of other investments and we can blow it in a split second. We're tuned into recognising good service but even more acutely tuned in to perfunctory interactions. Usually it's poorly trained or monitored staff but it's always the owner's responsibility to recognise and respond. The reason it's so insidious is because it's just below the threshold of tr...

International Best Seller! Are you impressed?...... Really? ........Why? Social credibility is a things these days. It's measured via LIKES and SHARES and positive commentary. Sometimes I feel like I'm in the Wizard of Oz! Every published author it seems has attained best seller status. The invisible small print may indicate a sub text such as 'best seller in a bookstore that sold one book last week'. Animal Farm was an actual best seller, a feat I imagine 99% of readers under the age of 40 today would find bewildering. When we scale embellishment too far we risk being unmasked. It's a common marketing tactic to author and then purchase the requisite number of books to hit #1 for at least a week. A brand can then be build around this lie. Even those who achieve the status of popularity are still only popular within a niche - for instance there is a niche for flat earth adherents, but I'd question the merit of 'crushing' it. Is popularity reall...

Fighting words! Our choice of words can define our perceptions of what's possible.  A circumstance is merely a label we use to describe an experience that we have already filtered through our senses. Usually  there's a sub text: 'give me  break - what with the weather, the kids, the economy, my mother in law - under the circumstances.....' The sub text is: 'I have an excuse to procrastinate, and I can sleep easy by justifying my lack of activity due to those damn circumstances.' Do you want to drop 10 Kilo's or earn an extra $25k or learn Spanish, attain a black belt in a martial art, learn a musical instrument, write a book, travel to Brazil or any number of goals that at first sight seem daunting? Beware those circumstances that your imagination has conjured up, just to keep you warm in the comfort zone of the ordinary. Dream BIG - and to hell with the circumstances - You live once - live it LARGE!! connect @ FACEBOOK

There's an apt saying: "Lead , follow or get out of the way." Indecision breeds confusion and disaster. Leaders are not necessarily smarter than you or I, or indeed more worthy of following - how many leaders have led their followers towards oblivion? What leaders do however is get things done. They share their vision, attract an audience and dictate the direction of the activity. Opportunities abound but so few grasp the thorns, fearful of the illusion of failure and their perceived vulnerability to criticism and ridicule. The pity is that concepts such as right or wrong are just that. All great achievements are preceded by hitherto perceptions of failure. Whether or not the world agrees with your proposition that the earth is flat or that evolution is a myth, or any number of beliefs you hold, the opinion of the masses need not impact you expressing your own genius. leaders make things happen and get things done. They make mistakes and adjust their cours...

If you actually set specific and measurable goals - then a big congratulations, because this puts you in fairly rarefied space. Most people have an innate sense of ambition. At its extreme it's manifested in the alpha male and female equivalent, whereby this sub species competes to the death with everyone for attention. Whether it's The Great Gatsby, or  the loud mouthed parent attempting to subvert all around them, this is not a healthy form of ambition. The other end of the spectrum is inhabited by those listless, uninspired, and often sad individuals, who invariably finds themselves marginalised by society at large. This post relates to what students of the mind might describe as self - actualised. Those who consciously make a decision to design their own destiny. Talent rises to its peak within the right environment, however the most genetically gifted swimmer on the planet may never attain any success in the realm of where their talent lies if fate doesn't put ...

Yet another disturbing article, this time in todays Sunday newspaper, regarding youth alienation and feelings of self loathing. We live in a culture that reflects a distorted view of 'reality'. Why the parenthesis? Reality is as intangible as a fleeting thought. Everything we percieve is filtered through a context lens. Alas we are mostly unaware that someone else is manipulating our filter. Our Facebook 'selfie' illicited no Likes and yet that vacuuous blonde bimbo gets an avalanche of positive and gushing comments with every uploaded pouting pic. This Social Media popularity contest really sucks. Of course I'm being facetious, but with positive intent. Cleverly merchanised personal branding is nevertheless just that, merchandised packaging. it really is OK to be you. Seeking the approval of a tribe that is self obsessed is a fools gold. Authenticity takes longer to crystallise but the pay off can last a lifetime. Authentic behaviour requires no pr...

After an unintended hiatus the Life Matters Blog returns! Of course the author was on hiatus, the absense of any Blogging, the 'bleeding obvious' consequence. Glad that's been cleared up! The last 12 months of yours truly's life journey has been formative and enlightening. Let me explain. In the pursuit of life balance I've taken many a detour around potential hindrances to this desired state. Along the way the goal was to avoid stress, conflict, any hint of a 9-5 existence, whilst living a happy, meaningfully fulfilled LIFE. This might be defined as "Getting a Life!" It occurred to me however that my strategy of moving away from what I despised was not moving me towards this image I had of Life Balance. My definition of Life Balance needs to be elaborated. Ultimately it relates to a sense of daily wellbeing. A heightened awareness and sense that life is awesome. This requires a balance inclusive of awesome relationships with lover and fami...

To wax lyrical on the relative awesomeness of yesteryear whilst decrying all that is modern is a popular pastime for the silver haired folk who hark back to these halcyon times albeit through a clouded lens that hardly bears up to scrutiny. Indeed it is unlikely that the word awesome is found in their vocabulary! It’s an Urban Myth.  The idyllic past inhabited by genial souls behind pristine picket fences who collectively interact in a pre Facebook form of connectivity is the stuff of romantic novelists. Child labour, civil rights abuse, cultural insensitivity, profound poverty and an expectation that an attack on your tribe should earn you a conscription to bear arms-axe, bayonet or something equally blood curling, as you defend your own in face to face mortal combat –all seem less appetizing in hindsight! Which brings me to a topic that seems rather trivial in comparison. Despite the aforementioned Urban Myth – I would suggest that some of the glue t...

Festive excess traditionally induces post hangover guilt and thoughts of new beginnings. The guilt creeps up slowly. Anticipation of party time frolicking with the requisite alcoholic gay abandon of youth abounds…. alas the capacity of youth to recover over a grease laden fry up of black pudding and anything else in the vicinity within 3 months of the used by date, diminish alarmingly post 30’s! Hope kicks in first. Hope that the hangover will be gentle. Hope that the scales will somehow deny the visual evidence around the gut. Hope that this year things will be better. Hope however rarely provides the appetite to actually take action, beyond perhaps the purchase of a Lotto ticket! Aspiration has a little more depth. It suggests a vague sense of commitment to a cause if perhaps lacking in a plan. Occasionally the post hangover conviction produces a tsunami of emotional triggers, ranging from disgust at what the mirror reveals, self loathing as the memories o...